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Timothy M. Murphy
1749 W. Golf Rd. Box 319
Mount Prospect, IL 60056
Email: tim@cutofthemurphy.com


Thursday, March 6, 2014

Heavy Lifting

I once read a post on a fitness forum, a thing I seem to be doing a lot of lately.  I don't recall the exact wording, but it contained a quote from some body builder or other, something like:

Everybody wants the body of a bodybuilder, but nobody wants to lift the damned heavy weights.

Now, this quote was given, as it was a fitness forum, to support the proposition that in order to build muscle and cut fat, one must lift weights, and lift heavy - low weight and high reps just won't cut it.  This is a proposition that, incidentally, I agree with, but that is beyond the scope of this post.  Rather, that quote contains wisdom for all of life's endeavors, as well as a spot on assessment as to why so many people never achieve their goals.  Everyone wants (insert accomplishment or goal here), but nobody wants to do the hard work it takes to get there.

We live in a culture literally overflowing with laziness and entitlement.  Never in human history has so much been given to so many in exchange for so little effort.  Kids need good grades to boost their "self-esteem," and instead of pushing them harder to earn higher marks, we lower the curve, make the tests easier, and then pat them on the back as congratulations for their new-found intellectual excellence.  Men want to find a supermodel-beautiful woman who rocks a miniskirt, is a tiger in the sack, and cranks out gourmet meals; but they never want to do the things necessary to make themselves attractive to such a woman, like taking care of the body, finding and keeping business and generating an income, and putting something inside the brain besides video game cheat codes (as Ice-T once said, "Wash your ass, do some sit-ups, read a book").  Women, of course, want a strong, sensitive man who will earn money, spend lots of time with the family, take care of all the problems, always listen to her, and say all the right things: it never occurs to them that a man like that will be looking for more than an occasional roll in the hay and an earful of bile each time Pwincess is displeased, about anything.  Without regard to gender, race, age or anything else, people almost universally want money (or enough to live comfortably), power (enough to get others to do the things one wants them to do), and fame (or recognition of what a great damned human being one is).

More than that, and here comes an even worse aspect of the problem, society fills peoples heads with the idea that all of these goodies are a right, rather than things to be earned through blood, sweat, tears, strength, determination, and prudent decision-making.  How many times I have heard someone say to a friend "you deserve better," or worse, "I deserve better."  But do you really deserve better?  Here is the news flash: Your mere existence as a human being on Planet Earth entitles you to precisely - nothing.  You are not entitled to love, respect, caring, consideration, a certain standard of living, or in fact, even to life itself.

If you want heads to turn when you walk down the street, put down the cheeseburger and hit the gym - we tell one another that all varieties of the human form are beautiful, but deep down, we all know that is a lie.  If you want someone to respect you for your mind, do something other than watch TV and burn up the Playstation - perhaps read a book?  If you want the high-life, put in the hours, use money wisely, and make it happen.  Do the heavy lifting - nobody else can do it for you.  Even if you just want life itself, you must guard your health like the treasure it truly is - work at it.

Perhaps the saddest thing is that this culture of entitlement we've created is really just a trick we play on ourselves.  While we tell each other that we are fine just the way we are, that people should accept us for us, and that we should be able to have it all; on some level, we all know that this is not real life.  But instead of doing the heavy lifting, we are clever about maintaining the slothful status quo.  We just lower our expectations of ourselves!  I actually know grown men content to earn minimum wage and spend the rest of their days sitting on their asses playing video games or watching sports.  I know women who languish in the grip of second-rate men, because they are second-rate themselves, and too inert to require more of themselves, and more for themselves.  And our young people have seen and taken these life-killing habits as their own, right down to their cores.

I am entitled to nothing.  If I want respect, I must make myself worthy of respect.  If I want love, I must become the type of person who inspires love.  Its fine to demand more from others, but first, let's demand more of ourselves.  Let's all do the heavy lifting.


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